By Amy Mathers
The aftermath of my heart transplant was more complex than I ever expected it to be. About six months later, the cytomegalovirus (CMV) from my donor heart kicked in, and I found myself spending all my time in hospital rooms and depressing doctor appointments, being told that it still hadn't been conquered. It wasn’t looking good for me, not because I was rejecting my new heart, but because I ended up having a strain of the virus immune to the usual medications used to treat it.
It was a time of my life ruled by IV medication schedules and physical isolation. I spent the first anniversary of my heart transplant in a hospital room decorated with my butterfly stickers and a new Read Canadian poster featuring YA author Susin Nielsen, a prized possession.
In the end, the treatment meant a choice between beating the CMV into submission or preserving my kidney function. And, as is the case with life-threatening illness, what seems like a choice is, in fact, merely trading one option for another that may, or will, cause you future problems.
Finding hope in those days was difficult. I had to trade my walker for an electric wheelchair, and I worked fervently on crocheting blankets to pass the time. Highlights included volunteering for the White Pine Selection Committee, a program I became enamoured with while working part-time at my high school library in 2002.
By the spring of 2012, I finally felt a sense of freedom I had not experienced since before my heart transplant. Though my electric wheelchair meant the end of my walking, it opened up the places I could go on my own again on my own schedule, as well as the distances I could travel. And I didn’t miss the falling.
Which is why, one warm, blissful day after an appointment with my heart transplant team at Toronto General Hospital, I made my way to the Lillian H. Smith Library on College Street. Known for its extensive collection of children’s literature, I was in my element, albeit also trying to navigate tight spaces discreetly in my new wheelchair. In the back of the first floor, my eyes landed on the print issue of a magazine I never imagined could have existed: Canadian Children’s Book News.
I didn't have a lot of time to peruse it, so I quickly flipped to the inside cover to see the publishing information and there were the words that burned themselves into my memory—Published by the Canadian Children’s Book Centre.
Much like the magazine, I had not known there was an entire centre dedicated to what I was also passionate about—children’s books by Canadian authors. One of the main reasons I had joined the White Pine Selection Committee was to familiarize myself with Canadian teen fiction writers because my knowledge was terribly lacking at the time.
I went home that night and looked up the Canadian Children’s Book Centre online to find their contact information and to email them. As I recall, it was pretty succinct—I was also passionate about Canadian children’s literature, and could I please volunteer for them?
And, luckily, Meghan Howe wrote back to say that, yes, I could.
Not that I was the best volunteer, mind you. I was quite slow at cataloguing picture books for the online database because I tended to read them so I could write accurate book summaries. And with my medical issues, I wasn’t the most reliable to schedule either. Despite these faults, I was still welcomed by Charlotte Teeple, Meghan Howe, Shannon Barnes, Dawn Todd and Camilia Kahrizi.
Their offices at Yonge and Eglinton, above the Northern District Branch of Toronto Public Library, were a dream for a bibliophile like me. Books everywhere, and all of them Canadian. They were a library unto themselves. Places where I am surrounded by books have long served to ground me and give me a sense of peace, and libraries are some of the happiest places I have known.
When the staff invited me to the 2012 Canadian Children’s Book Awards, I was ecstatic. A night dedicated to honouring Canadian children’s literature was beyond my wildest dreams. I remember arriving at the venue, sharing a quick hello with Meghan and Shannon, and then venturing in nervously, by myself.
Being in a wheelchair set me apart, though, and added to my anxiety. But to my great fortune, the first person to approach me was Sandra O’Brien, former teacher with a Masters of Education in Children’s Literature and future editor of Canadian Children’s Book News. Kind and compassionate, with a wonderful sense of humour, Sandra wrote articles for Book News and was also a reviewer for the magazine. It wasn’t long before I confessed to her that I would love to review books as well.
When Sandra left my side, I found myself next to Jean Little and her beautiful guide dog, stunned speechless. One of my favourite Canadian children’s authors, as well as part of family lore that at one point during her childhood, my Nana lived next door to Jean Little and was a playmate of hers, I felt as others do when encountering movie and TV celebrities, star-struck and certain I would not be able to say anything intelligent to Ms. Little. Authors are my celebrities.
Sandra O’Brien introduced me to Gillian O’Reilly, editor of Book News at the time, who graciously decided to let me try my hand at reviewing for the magazine. By the end of the awards ceremony, I felt like I had been to the literary equivalent of the Oscars and had found my people. Authors, illustrators, publishers and fans all came together to support children’s literature, and despite the vastness of Canada, the kidlit and teenlit communities feel like a family.
My first review book was Falling Kingdoms by Morgan Rhodes, and the review was in the spring 2013 edition of Canadian Children’s Book News. I remember how proud I was. Every time I saw the book in stores, I thought, “Wow, I reviewed that,” and I would well up with pride. Falling Kingdoms is now part of a six-book series and even has a prequel to its name. I still have my review copy.
I kept up reviewing books that year while also presenting Ms. Teeple with a proposal to raise money for a new award—one devoted to Canadian authors writing teen fiction. Somehow, after only a year of writing two reviews per issue, I talked myself into a Marathon of Books, where I would read a book and write a review every day for a year.
And Book News supported me through it.
I started writing articles for them. The first was about my work with bibliotherapy, then about my Marathon of Books. I even had the honour of writing the obituary for another one of my favourite authors, William Bell, whose novel, The Cripples’ Club (renamed Absolutely Invincible), inspired me to believe I was more than my disability.
After Sandra O’Brien took over as editor from Gillian O’Reilly, I happened to be at the Canadian Children’s Book Centre when a brainstorming meeting for Book News was taking place. We came up with an idea for a Teen Takeover issue for spring 2019, where teens would write reviews, offer their opinions, and agree to be interviewed by Kevin Sylvester. Sandra asked me if I would co-edit the issue, and I agreed, little knowing what I had gotten myself into.
What followed was a crash course in magazine editing. I worked with teens to edit their reviews and articles in a way that best captured their voices. I wrote introductions, part of the editor’s note at the beginning of the magazine, an opinion piece and interviewed authors. Trying to make sure deadlines were met. The experience increased my respect for Gillian, Sandra and now Shannon because putting together and editing a magazine is not something I could ever accomplish by myself.
The result was an issue of Canadian Children’s Book News that I will be proud of for the rest of my life. The dynamic artwork of Faith Erin Hicks’ Divided Earth adorns the cover; the perfect illustration for an issue devoted to teens.
Looking back, I wonder now what my life would have been like if I hadn’t come across an issue of Book News that day back in 2012. It was there when my life needed a new direction, when I was finally ready to pursue joy again, and opened up possibilities I never dreamed existed. That first issue was a calling card into a world where Canadian children and youth literature was supported and celebrated in equal measure. It was a place where I belonged, where I was free to come up with the wildest ideas and then work hard to make them come true with the support of Book News and the Canadian Children’s Book Centre.
The change of Canadian Children’s Book News from print to digital-only is both a loss and an opportunity. Even though it can be argued that the print copies had limited reach, I have looked forward to receiving them in the mail for 13 years now, with all their whimsical and, at times, deeply powerful covers.
But perhaps digital issues will act as a calling card to reach the next generation, inspiring more people to get involved in the many, many jobs that make up Canada’s rich collection of children and teen literature. This is a part of our wonderful heritage and culture that we need to protect now more than ever.
Amy Mathers is the founder of the Amy Mathers Teen Book Award and hosts the podcast YA Write! for the CCBC.